We all know that social skills are essential, but what does it mean to have them? The Oxford English Dictionary defines social skills as "a person's ability to conduct themselves in a socially acceptable way in conversation and interactions with others." This list of six ways to improve your social skills will equip you with the necessary tools.
1. Become An Expert Listener.
The most useful starting point is having an open mind toward people and wanting to understand their stories first-hand. If you're having difficulty understanding what they are saying, ask them questions that make sense of their answer or directly relate to your initial question. Once they've responded, give them time before continuing the conversation. This will allow them the space to process their thoughts and will make them feel respected and listened to.
2. Learn To Be More Assertive.
When you confide in someone, you must be assertive with your thoughts and opinions but avoid being aggressive or passive-aggressive when responding to certain statements. Avoid phrases like "yeah, I hate that too" instead, say, "I hear what you are saying, and I hate it too." You can significantly impact how people treat you by simply being assertive in your speech.
3. Select The Right Topics Of Discussion.
Many things could be discussed, but only a few topics of discussion will take the conversation forward, while others will likely lead nowhere. Questions like "how were your day" will almost always lead people to tell you about what happened, whereas the topic of "in your opinion" will encourage them to share much more.
4. Be Polite And Kind.
People spend a great deal of time engaging with others, but you must be polite and kind when you meet up with people. While I can't give you a specific formula for how to be nice socially, one thing I would recommend is not taking unnecessary risks and being selective in what subjects you discuss with people. As an introvert, it's hard for me to initiate conversations, but once someone starts talking to me, I make sure that I am polite, kind, and attentive to what they say.
5. Don't Take It Personally.
Everyone will have disagreements in relationships, but when they do, it is essential not to take it personally. Keep your emotions in check when dealing with differences and instead focus on being open-minded about how you can resolve the issue. No one likes conflict, but it's essential to talk through problems and work towards a solution instead of avoiding them altogether, causing more harm.
6. Observe Before Participating
Before you start talking about yourself or joining in an existing conversation, observe the people you will be talking with and determine where you fit into their social circle. This will help you to gauge how you should act and lead the conversation, rather than being forced into it from day one. This way, you aren't taking any risks but can still be part of a group or party.
Not many people naturally have social skills and those who do often find that it takes a great deal of effort. The key is to begin doing these six things consistently, and then once you see the increases in your confidence levels, you will continue improving your social skills as well.
I hope this list of six ways to improve your social skills has given you an insight into some common mistakes while being socially active online. The next step is to take the information and begin implementing it into your life-changing experience.