It’s undeniable that we all have expectations. And when these expectations are not met, it can be disappointing. In these moments, there will always be people who describe a feeling of disappointment as “happiness followed by sadness”. Though this is just a layman’s term for what happens in the brain when emotions in response to new information conflict with one another, it underlines the fact that we need to adjust our expectations — and fast!
It isn't always easy to do so. As time passes, our expectations for things we cannot control get bigger and bigger. The more we lose control over them, the more the disappointment grows, making us weaker and weaker.
This is the secret that painters and musicians really understand — they are in their art to control their disappointment. How? By giving their negative emotions to paint or music instead of themselves. Musicians play notes they don’t like and painters try to paint when they don’t feel inspired. And what happens? Their tools become instruments of inspiration.
It isn’t easy to accept and move on from our own disappointment. But in order to be happy and truly enjoy life, it’s important to do so. In this post, we'll discuss 5 simple steps that can help you with adjusting your expectations. Let’s go!
1. Understand that it won't last forever
It's easy to get stuck in the feeling of disappointment during trying times — because when we experience a setback, it's difficult not to focus on how unhappy we are. Having low self-esteem only makes matters worse as we will constantly remind ourselves of our failures and shortcomings. The best thing to do when we find ourselves stuck in these spirals of negativity is to take a step back and remember that our sadness will not last forever.
As mentioned above, happiness is followed by sadness. But once we go through this sad phase, we can quickly find ourselves in the sweet spot of happiness again! So instead of focusing on how disappointed you are, keep reminding yourself that it won't last forever. You'll make it through just fine — even better than before!
2. Let's get back on track
Once we understand that disappointment won't last forever, it’s time for the second step! Look for what you can do to move back on track and make those destination goals a reality. After all, that's where all the fun is, right? Most people have this feeling of disappointment because they forget that they have things to be grateful for. All of these little pleasures are actually an important part of our lives. And if we look deeply enough, we'll discover that they're actually quite meaningful.
Reframe these little moments as obstacles and gifts — you see them as challenges to a much bigger goal. And the fact that you've experienced disappointment so far means that you've made it this far and won't give up until you reach your destination. Keep in mind that when we get to our destination, we’ll have many more small obstacles and disappointments to overcome! This is just something that happens until we do what’s important and achieve something bigger than ourselves. But remember: The goal is worth all of these disappointments!
3. Put yourself first
As I mentioned above, disappointment isn't the only thing keeping us stuck in this world of problems. It’s easy for us to lose our inspiration during trying times — and nothing feels better than going through these times just to feel good again.