The other day my 10-year-old was at the park with her three friends. They were playing a game where they chase one another. My daughter is fast and agile and could easily keep up with her friends, but she complained that nobody would let her win.
This particular event, I witnessed for about twenty minutes, as this game went on for some time. It struck me how much kids these days try to be like adults and adults are trying to act like kids. It is difficult for many people to remember what it was like to be a child.
Every kid likes to play, and I am sure most adults do too, except present company is exempt from that. The problem arrives when they are playing a game and it's decided who will win or lose. Every kid wants to win, but that's not how children play games. They play so they enjoy the process of the game, not so they can brag about winning or get something in return for losing. It's not always possible for everyone to win every game. In fact it is almost impossible. I remember my daughter came home one day with a new nickname– "Loser."
In the end, she came to accept this nickname and still likes to play. She would not be the first kid to change their mind.
Many times in life, the best thing we can do is let go of our ego and enjoy the game without trying to win or lose. It's actually hard to win every time we play a game but if you don't want to lose you can practice losing gracefully like my daughter does by just playing and having fun. There is no real joy in winning, it's in having fun that you feel like you're winning.
In fact, winning and losing are very overrated. Whether you win or lose can't really be determined in a game of tag with friends, who cares? The only thing that matters is that you get to play the game with your friends.
As if proving this point in life, it was later revealed in my daughter's next statement: "A lot of people don't want to play with me, because they think I am really good."
This is the attitude we want our kids to develop: To be proud of what they've done but never gloat about it. To focus on playing and having fun. And to not care about winning every time.
Sometimes all we ever really can do is play the game to have fun and not care about winning or losing. If you find that you are losing, then practice losing until it's not so bad anymore.
This way, we can all be happy to play the game. We can let go of the idea of who is supposed to win and who is supposed to lose and enjoy life more.
Let us play, not try to win or lose. Let us find joy in our successes, but even more happiness in our failures. Don't be too hard on yourself; instead, try again tomorrow with a different strategy. We will never be winners, but we can still enjoy the game of life. [ARTICLE END]
Image: https://www.flickr.com/photos/michaelpuche/3224455133/
Image: https://www.flickr.com/photos/michaelpuche/3224455134/
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