7 Essential Steps To Overcoming Adversity
It's true that adversity is one of the most powerful teachers for resilience. Though you may find it hard to believe, adversity has a positive side—if you know how to handle it well. Here are seven vital steps towards overcoming adversity:
1. Be present. Be present in the moment, right now and right here in this very spot where you are currently sitting or standing (or laying). There’s no escaping bad thoughts and feelings, but being fully aware of them can make all the difference.
2. Connect with empathy and love. This is where I disagree with many popular self-help theories that say you should think positively. Instead of thinking positively, connect with your empathy and love. Send those feelings to those you care about, and surround yourself with people who are capable of sending their empathy and love to you.
3. Ask for help. Do not try to be the Lone Ranger by yourself when facing adversity. Ask for help from those around you who can understand your pain; this is an opportunity for them to learn about your obstacles so that they can offer better compassion (and sometimes assistance).
4. Acknowledge your successes, no matter how small they may seem at the time (it’s important to separate these from mere “results”). As you acknowledge your successes, they will help you to establish a sense of accomplishment and fulfillment that will help you to keep moving forward.
5. Be willing to be flexible in your thought patterns and behavior, because the past is no longer relevant and future fears are not guaranteed to occur. Let go of the past and live right now in this imperfect spot where you are currently standing or sitting or laying. And set intentions for the future, but take it one day at a time.
6. Stay focused on what’s in front of you, no matter how impossible it may seem. Whatever happens today can only happen RIGHT NOW . . . and it may be the only thing that you have control over . . . or you can let go of all control.
7. Know that each setback contains within it a blessing, because each of us has to learn lessons in order to grow and become stronger and more resilient. So feel good about what happened, think good thoughts about what was learned from the adversity, and hope for the best . . . but in the very moment you are feeling bad, remind yourself that this is not forever. It's temporary, so remember that there is always a way out—you just have to take the next step towards recovery.
The most important takeaway here is that you have to keep moving. Don't give up, although it may feel like the end of the world when one of those adversity-related setbacks happens. Keeping moving means reaching out to others who can understand what you're going through, and it means finding ways to gain a greater sense of appreciation for the good things in your life now—and in spite of what happened in the past.
If nothing else, keep moving and be mindful about where you are . . . even if you’re not positive about where you're going.
And you may want to recall a story that is often told about Muhammad Ali. When he was diagnosed with Parkinson's disease, doctors told him that he might never be able to talk again. He replied, "I'm not talking anymore? Now I'm nothing?" At first, it didn't seem like this would be the end of his boxing career—and of course it wasn't. But the point here is that if we test our endurance we may find that the illness and setbacks will only make us stronger and more resilient—not less so.
Perseverance is most definitely one of the seven essential steps towards overcoming adversity.
I'm feeling better already.
7 Essential Steps To Overcoming Adversity: http://www.drsuepedersen.com/2012/05/seven-essential-steps-to-overcoming.html
By Dr. Sue Pedersen
Posted in Articles, Resilience | 2 Comments »
Title: How To Survive What You Are Going Through Right Now
Author: Jason Reid, Founder of the Reid Technique Group and Known as the World's Leading Interviewer
An Overview of 7 Keys to Building Personal Resilience . . . and Surviving What You're Going Through Right Now by Jason Reid http://thereidtechnique.com/blog/2012/07/the-7-keys-to-personal-resilience-part-1/.
Over the last year or so, I've had the pleasure of working with a huge number of highly successful entrepreneurs, lawyers, and other professionals who have either been through their share of adversity in business or in their personal life.
The common thread running through all these people is that they've all used a very specific set of steps to cope with failure and adversity. These steps are not always perfect, but they are very effective in helping you deal with what you find difficult about life.
Conclusion