Self Help For Women
As a woman in the 21st century, it can be easy to feel as though you have no voice. You might feel like society is constantly trying to make you believe that certain types of behavior are not only acceptable but actually good for you. And even if it's not always explicitly made clear that these messages are just for women, the "for Women" tag mandates them nonetheless.
For women to be happy, we need only follow the rules that society has laid out for us. We need only do what society says is best for our own happiness. We are told over and over again "if you want to be happy…"
This is not true.
You do not gain happiness or self love by blindly doing whatever you have been conditioned to believe is right for you. If it's sad, find a way to change it; if it's painful, find a way to stop it.
The Harsh Truth about Self-Help
So before we get into the actual content of this article, let's be honest: one of the main reasons why society has created this "for Women" tag is because we're all actually told "self help" is evil. We're told that self-help guides are not to be trusted, and most people don't even know where to begin when looking for something helpful.
That's the harsh truth about self-help for women. It has been misused, abused and made into a joke, making women feel even more uncomfortable with their own sexuality or empowerment. You may be asking "how can this help me?" If you can take a step back from that question and look at it from another angle, maybe you'll find the answer is actually quite simple.
Don't believe what you're told… Believe what works.
The fact of the matter is that self-help and self-improvement have been used for evil, but these concepts are not inherently evil. In fact, it's the exact opposite; because these are methods to help yourself grow and become a better person, they can never really be "evil".
Are you a feminist?
You might be asking yourself: why am I reading an article that says something that supports feminism, when feminism itself is based on self-esteem, not self help? The answer is simple: self-help methods are actually very empowering, and they're the only way to truly change society.
Through self-help methods and strategies, we can reach milestones in our lives that we can't reach through traditional "self help". It's through self-help that we can truly live the life we want to live; it's not by following society's rules, but instead by breaking them.
In today's society, women are often put in situations where we are told what is good for them.
For instance, let's look at a girl who has been conditioned to believe that if she has a boyfriend who loves her more than anything else (most guys do), then this means that she is "in love" and therefore must also be happy and loved.
If she had a boyfriend who loves her more than anything else, but she herself doesn't feel any love or happiness towards him, is this truly a good situation?
How can you be in love with someone and not actually feel any emotions towards them? Isn't that what love is supposed to be all about? It's supposed to bring out the true emotions in you, and one of these emotions should definitely be love. Even if you're in a relationship with someone who loves you, it shouldn't matter if you don't feel any love towards them.
If you feel like this, it can be very easy to come to the conclusion that there's something wrong with your feelings. It can be easy to believe that maybe it's your fault for not being "in love" enough, or for not feeling any emotions towards someone who loves you so much.
This is a direct effect of society's self-help system. We are told how to be happy (so long as it fits into our society's self-help method for happiness), and we're told that if we want to be happy, we must conform to these messages.
"You need to be in love with someone you're dating, because then you'll be happy."
"You need a man to make your life worthwhile, because then you'll be happy. "
"You need to make sure he loves you more than you love him, because then you'll be happy."
We're told that if we want to be happy, we must follow these messages. And if we don't… what is wrong with us? Why isn't it working for us? There is something wrong with us, and the only way to fix it is by following society's rules a little closer. We are constantly told that there is something wrong with women who stray outside of societal norms.
Conclusion
But the reality is that if a guy loves you more than anything else, but you don't feel any love towards him, this is not a bad situation.
In fact, this should be a very good situation because it means that he really does love you. In fact, you can even go out and meet the perfect guy for you by following the steps in this article and using self-help for women properly.
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Self Help For Women