Are You Afraid Of Success
There are many different ways of looking at success, but few people will argue that it's a good thing. Fewer still would argue that it can come with some challenges - challenges which can be difficult to overcome. But what if you're so used to these challenges that you don't know any other way of life?
In this article, we'll explore the concept of a fear of success and how it manifests in individuals. From there, we'll look at the lengths one might go to avoid the pressures and rewards that come with being successful.
The Pros and Cons of Success
Success can come with a variety of benefits. There are obvious ones like wealth, fame, admiration and so on. But there are also less sought after benefits like the freedom to look after yourself, financial independence and the opportunity to do what you really love doing. If nothing else, success is finding happiness in your life.
However, it's not all rosy. There are many challenges that come with success which may or may not be worth the effort for some people.
One of the biggest challenges of success is not just finding happiness, but keeping it. Many people find that once they get to a certain point in their lives, they have to work harder and harder to maintain their happiness instead of just enjoying it. This is a very difficult process and can often lead to a lack of motivation and eventually failure.
Another challenge is maintaining relationships with friends or family once you become successful. Suddenly you have more free time so you spend less time with people who may not be able to understand your new lifestyle and way of thinking. This can lead to feelings of isolation and a lack of support.
Success can also bring on intense feelings of pressure and even resentment. When you are successful, other people will expect you to perform as well or better than you did before. If you don't perform, you make not just yourself look bad but others who have supported and believed in you. This can be a huge source of pressure which only gets worse the longer it is placed on your shoulders.
A fear of success is closely related to these problems brought by success. However, in order to define this problem we need an explanation - let's call it "success at what?".
Fear Of Success At What?
This explanation will be helpful in understanding the concept of the fear of success. A few years ago I wrote an article called "Success At What?", now it's time to refine it and expand on it. In this article, I'll be referring to this idea as "success at what?" or "success as a measure".
There are many different ways that people measure their success. Some people might measure their success by how much money they make, how many awards they receive or how big of a following they have on the internet. Others might use these measures along with other aspects of their lives in order to determine what is considered successful for them.
There are no right or wrong ways to measure success. However, being open to new ways of measuring success can help you improve yourself and find happiness in your life. Here are some ideas you can try:
Try measuring your success by the number of people who look up to you and try to live your life as best they can.
Use the amount of time you spend actively pursuing goals and the effect this has on your life instead of measuring how much money you make.
Measure your success by the amount of time you spend working on improving yourself and the quality of your life rather than measuring how much money you make.
Once you know what your measures for success are, develop a plan to improve as much as possible with as little effort as possible by looking at it holistically. For example, instead of focusing on improving your friendships, do more activities that bring you closer to other people and help them understand who you are so they can be part of your life story. Or instead of working on increasing your income, use these measures along with other aspects of your life in order to find happiness.
Fear of Success in Action
As I've previously mentioned, success can bring immense amounts of pressure - pressure which can be hard to deal with and sometimes seem impossible to overcome. When you are just starting out on your journey, these pressures may not seem like a big deal, but as you progress and get closer to reaching your goals the pressure will seem overwhelming.
At this point many people give up - they lose motivation, stop working towards their goals or simply move onto something else which doesn't bring them any pain. There is a huge difference between being afraid of success and giving up on your dreams because of it. So how do you know when you've crossed the line? Read on...
How To Measure Success
In order to identify whether a fear of success is present, it's important to have a solid understanding of what success actually is. This can be difficult to understand at first because we always assume that the measure of success we use defines what "success" actually is.
Remember, there are no right or wrong ways to measure your success - as long as your goals are realistic and you have enjoyed the journey you've been on so far. Using these measurements will allow you to maintain motivation and avoid the problems related with being successful.
You can't use one single measurement for everything though - otherwise, it would be impossible to define what is successful for any one person.
For example, one person might claim "I want to make $10,000 a month." This person could be perfectly happy and successful if they were able to achieve their goal of making $10k/month. However, another person might claim the same goal and still not be happy with themselves.
The only way to determine whether someone is doing well or not is by looking at all aspects of their life - where they've been, how they got there and where they're going. The journey is as important as the destination.
Finding What Works For You
In order to find success, you must first understand what success means to you. Find a way to measure where you are right now and how your life is currently evolving. This can be done by reflecting on your life and looking at the progress you've made so far. Use this as a way to determine what's working and what isn't working in your life right now.
Goals are usually the best way to measure progress because they define exactly what you want to achieve in any aspect of your life.
Conclusion
Being successful isn't going to happen overnight, but if you're willing to put in a little effort and make the right choices along the way, you can have your freedom and become a happier person. In the next article I'll be sharing more about how success is created and giving ideas on how you can create your own. Stay tuned!
About The Author
Luca is an expert in personal development and business. He writes articles to help people learn about themselves and find their purpose in life - pushing them into becoming happy, successful & wealthy people. You can follow Luca on Facebook.