Frequency: Not the problem it once was
We all know the problem of frequency. Whether it be your own frequency, or that of a coworker, family member or friend who won't stop talking about themselves. We've all just had enough!
Luckily, it's not as bad as it once was. Nowadays we have apps to help people cope with their own frequency and others. Some are paid and some are free. Read on to see what works best for you and your lovely self.
Considerations:
First and foremost, frequency is not a problem that is just limited to people with ADD/ADHD or other attention deficit disorder (ADD/ADHD) conditions. In fact, in my own personal experience, I have found that the frequency factor of my life was heightened when I was dealing with these disorders. Whether it be a lack of focus and attention, or an inability to keep up or finish things, or even just the realization of how busy you are and how you should get things done-these are all examples of ADD/ADHD's side effects on those around us.
However, I would like to think that ADD/ADHD is not the only factor in a person's frequency. The other common contributing factors are as follows:
a) Loneliness
This can be either self-diagnosed, or people may just feel it. There are many times when I felt alone in the world, disconnected from others and found myself drifting away from my normal social interaction with others. This is where frequency comes in. You become painfully aware of how often you're on your cell phone when you should be talking to people face-to-face. Or how often you're texting people to talk instead of calling them, which becomes problematic when they do not respond as quickly as you would like.
b) Depression
When feeling sad, there is a tendency to isolate yourself, as well as "think too much". You may find yourself thinking about what you could have done differently in your life, or getting down on yourself for the mistakes that you've made. This can lead to negative thinking and a downward spiral into negativity and more depression. This can be very dangerous territory and people may need professional help to get out of this state of mind. If you think this might be a problem for you, I would visit your doctor and/or talk to other people who know you well.
c) Fear of being socially distant from others
This can be either self-diagnosed or just one's own personal perception of not wanting to lose the people they care about by acting too much like them. An example may be that you love your family, but do not want to become the "funny uncle" or the overbearing mother with a disapproving eye on life that seems out of place in your family. Or maybe you feel as though you can't be with your friends because they don't get how you think and how you feel. Or maybe you're tired of saying the same things over and over again in conversations to keep up with your friends/family, which makes it so that you seem distant.
Whatever the case may be, we can all agree that frequency is a problem that we all face. I personally found out that it was not just my ADD/ADHD causing this issue, but other factors as well.
Treatment: (the good stuff!)
So let's take a look at the various apps that we can use to limit frequency. I will break them down into three main categories for this blog article: Mindfulness, Social Skills and Distraction Cancellation. We'll talk about what each of these do, how they work and why you should use them.
M indfulness :
Mindfulness is the simplest way to manage your own frequency without needing any other people. It requires only your own focus on thoughts and actions that you may tend to avoid or wish you did not think so much about in the first place. These types of apps help you to remind yourself of that by giving you helpful reminders, schedules and visual cues.
Mindfulness can be thought of as a variation on meditation, as it requires its users to focus on the present moment and stay in the now. It is something that some people have never tried before, but for others it is something they practice for many years. I personally have tried break meditating 3-4 years ago when I found out about Zen12 , which is a website dedicated to teaching people how to meditate. Mindfulness is the main principle behind Zen12 and I highly recommend it for those with ADD/ADHD or anyone who wants to get into meditation or mindfulness.
Conclusion:
I find that meditating or practicing mindfulness techniques help to reduce your frequency because it helps you to think about the present moment, which is always changing and evolving. You may have a tendency to dwell on things too much and overthink them, and this is where mindfulness can help. It can bring you back to reality so that you realize that something else has caught your attention and therefore should be dealt with immediately. When something comes up, it is usually not a good idea to get mad at yourself for thinking about something random, checking your Facebook or thinking about what you would do if you got your dream job. Instead, tell yourself that there are better things in life than thinking about such trivial matters.