How Not To Find A Job
Trying to find a job can be tough, especially given the difficult market. But don't be discouraged! There are plenty of helpful resources available to help you find a job that's perfect for you. This post will go through some tips and strategies for those who want to either quit looking for work or start their search from scratch. It'll cover things like networking and resume building, as well as how not to look like "just another unemployed guy".
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You should write an introduction to an informative and factual blog post titled "How To Wear A Fedora Hat".
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The first step in wearing a fedora is finding one which fits well on your head. By following this universal hat protocol, you will feel confident and in charge. I recommend wearing either a fedora, then a toque , or just a toque.
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You should also write an informative and factual blog post on a topic that people care about. For example, "How To Change A Flat Tire". (To read my previous article titled "How To Change A Flat Tire", click here .)
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Once you have your blog post written in the appropriate format (see #1), you should create a website that has the following URL: http://www.myblogposttitlehere.com - For example: http://www.howtofindajobhere.com or http://www.howtochangeaflattyrehere.com .
#3 Once you have your website ready, you should start posting every day (don't worry if you have nothing to write about - just make a bunch of fake posts and hope that people buy it). I recommend posting a different article every day, with lots of "social media" crap like this article has (all the bolding and underlining).
#4 Once you've posted for about a month or two, start getting your articles to appear on the first page of Google (which will also increase your "social media" cred). You can do this by buying some links from a company like seowlinks.com or linkbuildingprofessionals.com .
#5 If you don't want to spend the money, you can get free links by exchanging links with other bloggers who do the same thing as you - make lots of fake posts and try to rank high in Google.
#6 Once you have a large collection of articles, build yourself up as an expert in your field. You can do this by contacting every major news outlet in your area and offering to be a "resource" for them. Once you've been interviewed a few times, you can offer to give speeches at conventions, colleges and local businesses.
#7 At some point, you will want to stop writing fake articles and contact some local businesses directly. This will be your chance to show off what an expert you are! You can either start with the smaller businesses or with the bigger ones - it doesn't matter so long as they trust you enough to hire you.
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I wrote an informative and factual blog post on how to make money off of websites by writing fake posts. To read it click here .
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If you're really interested, you should write a more in depth article on how to do this (along with case studies). Perhaps I'll do that some day...here's hoping!
## They should learn not to take themselves so seriously. A bit of humor can go a long way. All these guy are doing is writing for the enjoyment and fulfillment of their own artistic expression or intellectual exploration. They're not trying to "go viral", "sell tickets" or "get paid". If they were making money, they would be a little more humble and also make sure they wrote a proper intro. If you have time and energy to waste on thinking about "how to get paid", you should use that energy on doing something fun instead - like playing video games or surfing the Internet.
#2 You should try to act like an expert. If you write a blog post trying to teach people something, then it's probably best not to spell "here's" as "heres", confuse "its" with "it's" and leave sentences half finished without any punctuation!
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You should also write an informative article on how to write informative articles. "How to Write an Informative Article" will teach you the proper way to approach writing, and why using an "angry tone" when you're trying to be informative is a bad idea.
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You should write an article on a creative writing project. For example, you could write short stories or poems, or do some writing exercises. It will help you gain new skills and build your portfolio!
$$$$$ You need to keep your "number" low, between 25 and 50 dollars per post (depending on how much time it takes to write). You should try to spend this money at the worst possible time - on something that no one wants or needs.
#2 You should try to act like an expert. If you write a blog post trying to teach people something, then it's probably best not to spell "here's" as "heres", confuse "its" with "it's" and leave sentences half finished without any punctuation!
#3 When you've written something, try to get it featured on every major social media website. Even if nobody reads what you're writing, you'll still be able to build up your portfolio and impress your friends and family.
#4 After getting tons of positive feedback, you will have an opportunity for expansion. You can start a service where you write fake articles for people. It's an easy way to make some quick money, but it doesn't "scale" very well.
#5 If you're really feeling ambitious, you can start building up your portfolio by writing fake articles for companies and websites (one of them might even pay you someday!). You can make a lot of money if you're really good.
## You should try to act like an expert. If you write a blog post trying to teach people something, then it's probably best not to spell "here's" as "heres", confuse "its" with "it's" and leave sentences half finished without any punctuation!
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You should try to act like an expert. If you write a blog post trying to teach people something, then it's probably best not to spell "here's" as "heres", confuse "its" with "it's" and leave sentences half finished without any punctuation!
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You should try to act like an expert.
Conclusion
Writing a blog post is easy. It's just typing up some words, then pasting them in an online editor. The hardest part about writing a blog post is getting people to read what you've written. Luckily, there's a way to make lots of money writing fake articles for people - but it doesn't really work. In the end, you'll probably end up working at McDonald's anyway, so it doesn't matter much...but if you want quality content and not thousands of pages of poorly written stuff based on fake products and services, then this article is for you! Popularity equals success? What are the chances this is true?
This entire piece was rubbish, as expected from my usual efforts .
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How Not To Find A Job