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On May 1st, 1986, I left my job as a grade 6 teacher. Six years earlier, I had left the state college and taken two years leave to go traveling. I wasn't quite sure what I wanted to do with my life, so I joined two friends and we traveled the world for five years, doing research and doing research at museums, going to conferences, talking to people and asking what truly makes their lives tick. I was nearly twenty-seven when I did. A few days later, two of my co-workers and a secretary were talking to me, and I asked them all how they were going to celebrate, and they all seemed a little hesitant to give me a real answer. ' We don't work today. We don't work tomorrow. We don't work on the weekend. We don't work on Mothers Day. We don't work on Fathers Day. We don't work Thanksgiving, Christmas, New Years. We don't work for a month when the solstice falls, but we do work for three weeks during and immediately after New Years, when the white hole is empty, but we'll work for two days after Christmas.' I had no idea what they were talking about, and asked them if this was going to go on for six years.
They all started to say no. That was almost ten years ago. In fact, one of the co-workers went home that day and her son blew up the house with dynamite. It fell on him but missed him by millimeters.
I couldn't let that happen to me. I was getting sick and tired of being jobless, unhealthy, and almost homeless. So I went home and lived at home my first year. That year, my father got a job at an ad agency. We rented a house in the same block in the next town over. I got a job a few days after that. At a "Last Chance Clothing Store." I worked part time, then I went to the library and got a job working part time in the afternoons at the library, then I got a full time job at the library in the mornings.
After that, I made money. I bought a trailer, fixed it up, and started to collect things.
Then someone told me that one of my friends had died. He had a family. His wife was killed. His sister-in-law got a major injury. I was told they didn't have life insurance but they had plenty of money. I went to work that day and told the manager that I was quitting. He said, "You don't have a diploma, Skills 'R Us doesn't come to your door, and people can't read."
What I said after that shocked him. I told him that I just found out that my friend died last night, I didn't wake up until ten this morning, so I was five hours late for work, I was getting there an hour-and-a-half before my shift started anyways, and your own employee had left for the day yesterday and he's been bad mouthing me, so I'm not quitting, you're making me quit. I finished my shift and went to a bar and got drunk and read a book. Then I left.
Then I got a job the next day. I worked at a library. The librarian. Office manager, maintenance, janitor, cat's ass, God knows what.
Then I got two jobs. I got a job at a movie store and they had a service hotline. Someone left me a bar of gold that they found buried near their house. I thought it was a bar of gold, but I grabbed it out of the truck and found that it was just a big old nickel. They were so sorry that they left me a service hotline job and a janitorial job at the school where I taught.
Then I got a job working on emergency 911 calls. I went to school for that. They gave me a combination scanner-radio-telephone-radio-television. I went to school for one month. They told me it would take six months to train me to use that equipment. I told them that I could use it after six weeks, and I did. They worked me from 4:00 PM to 12:00 AM six nights a week.
Then I got a job in a factory. They trained me for less than two hours. I had to train the foreman and the rest of the crew. I pulled a fuse out of the wall, but the whole thing was a fake. They gave me a fake light switch and a fake fuse box. That was fake.
Conclusion:
I got three men crippled and almost killed, sent a man to the hospital, gave someone his first and only heart attack, and I still pulled the fake light switch and got electricity to the whole factory for twenty minutes.
I was then promoted to the area manager, and I got a big raise, and a company car. I didn't have a driver's license, but the license had my name on it and it wasn't a fake.